Wednesday, May 13, 2009

Monogamy Part 1

With all due respect to those of this community that practice "polyamory", The princibles of infidelity in a two person relationship is flawed. And when I say two person relationship, I mean two people that have come together under the law, come together under their god and come together under the same roof.

Going outside of the relationship for your intimate needs lessons your relationship because...... you're not getting the most out of what that relationship has to offer. People usually can not see the beauty of what their partner has to offer because they're more concerned with what their own personal needs are or that their partner doesn't know what pleases them.

That's a lack of communication.

If you are in a conventional two person relationship, and your S.O. wants to go outside the the relationship for things that were reasons for entering the two person relationship, eventually there will come a time when one or the other says: "What's the point of being trapped in this relationship"?

What's the point of living with the same person, when you're dinning and sleeping with someone else? What's the point of sharing financial responsibilities if one party is spending the disposable income on entertaining someone out side the circle of intimacy?

Why not divorce and be free to see as many people as wish as often as you wish?

Because deep down inside, we want someone that we trust to be there at the emergency room when all hell has caved in. We know that two people that "cleave together" live longer than those who live alone and use other people for social stimulation. We know that the bond between two humans is so great than when someone in an LTR dies, the survivor usually follows 2 to 6years later.

We know that when you live with someone long enough and are truthful and respecting of them, it makes you a better person. We learn more from exclusive relationships about ourselves if we're open minded enough to look inward and see what it is we're doing or not doing.

Anyone can put their best foot forward in a date. But this person could be someone entirely different 18 months later.

Speaking as a musician; I've dated more people than I can remember. Seriously, strangers have come up to me claiming to have slept with me back in the day. It's embarassing and sad to a point.

And then there are those few that were truly special.

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